it's true, i crave you.

Height: 5’7

Current weight: 135

Highest weight: 145

Lowest weight: 104

Goal weight: 120

Favorite binge food: Alfredo

What makes you strong: Music

How many calories do you consume a day? 800-1000
What do you see when you look in the mirror?: Broken mess.

Have you ever fasted? Mhm.
Are you in a relationship? No.
Are you the fat or thin one out of your friends? In between.

Are you depressed? If that’s what they call it.
Ever been to a psychologist? Yes

Are you on any medication? No


Currently:

[] anorexic

[] bulimic

[] living off laxative/diet pills

[] hungry

[x] thirsty

[x] drinking something

[] Under 100lbs

[] fasting/starving myself


People:

[x] have asked if I’m anorexic/bulimic

[x] have called me fat

[x] have said I’m skinny

[x] have said I’m ugly

[x] have said I’m pretty

[x] spread rumors about me

[x] forced me to eat

[] say I eat too much

[x] wish I’d eat more


I wish:

[x] I was THIN

[x] I had a better body

[x] I didn’t have to eat

[x] I could control myself

[] I was under 100 lbs

[] I could avoid food

[x] I could hide what I am

[x] I wasn’t fat

[x] I was pretty


I love:

[x] feeling hungry

[] seeing a difference when fasting

[] shaking

[] feeling airy

[x] losing weight

[] being anorexic/bulimic

[x] coffee

[] green tea

[] diet pills

[x] being able to turn down food

[x] feeling good about myself


Appearance:

[] I am shorter than 5’4

[x] I think I’m ugly

[x] I have scars

[] I wish my hair was a different colour

[] I have friends who have never seen my natural hair color

[x] I have a tattoo

[x] I am self-conscious about my appearance

[] I have/had braces

[x] I wear glasses/contacts

[] I would get plastic surgery if it were 100% safe, free of cost, and scar-free

[x] I’ve been told I’m attractive by a complete stranger

[x] I have more than 2 piercings

[x] I have piercings in places besides my ears

[x] I have freckles


Family:

[x] I’ve sworn at my parents

[xx] I’ve run away from home

[x] I’ve been kicked out of the house

[] My biological parents are together

[] I have a sibling less than one year old

[x] I want to have kids someday

[] I’ve had children

[x] I’ve lost a child/baby

[] I can’t have children


Relationships:

[x] I’m single

[] I’m in a relationship

[] I’m engaged

[] I’m married

[] I’ve gone on a blind date

[x] I’ve been the dumpee more than the dumper

[x] I miss someone right now

[x] I have a fear of abandonment

[x] I’ve cheated in a relationship

[] I’ve gotten divorced

[x] I’ve had feelings for someone who didn’t have them back

[] I’ve told someone I loved them when I didn’t

[x] I’ve told someone I didn’t love them when I did

[] I’ve kept something from a past relationship

[x] I’ve been ‘the other woman’


Sexuality:

[x] I’ve had a crush on someone of the same sex

[] I’ve had a crush on a teacher 

[x] I am a cuddler

[x] I’ve kissed in the rain

[x] I’ve hugged a stranger

[x] I have kissed a stranger


Bad Times:

[x] I’ve consumed alcohol

[x] I regularly drink

[] I can’t swallow pills

[] I can swallow numerous pills at a time without water

[x] I have been diagnosed with depression

[x] attempted suicide

[x] I shut others out when I’m upset

[] I take anti-depressants

[] I’m anorexic or bulimic

[x] I’ve slept an entire day when I didn’t need it

[x] I’ve hurt myself on purpose

[x] I’ve woken up crying

[x] I’ve fallen asleep crying

[x] I’ve lost weight

[x] I’ve gained weight

[] My weight holds me back

[] Weight consumes me

[] I’m at my thinnest

[] I’m at my biggest

[x] I’ve lost weight and kept it off

[x] I’ve lost weight but gained it back

[x] My weight affects my mood

[] I weigh myself daily

[x] I am jealous of everyone smaller than me

[x] I hate compliments

[x] I want to tell people to “stop lying” when they compliment me

[x] I feel bigger than people who are my size

[] I feel happy when I’m hungry

[x] I get depressed after I eat

[x] I’ve skipped a meal

[x] I’ve thrown food away

[x] I’ve spit food out

[x] I’ve fasted

[] I’ve taken diet pills

[] I’ve used laxatives

[x] I’ve purged

[x] I exercise

[] I exercise so I can eat

[x] I work out secretly

[] I work out daily

[x] I’ve fainted from exhaustion


I’ve done:

[x] Weed

[x] Cigarettes

[x] Alcohol

[x] Caffeine pills

[] Diet pills

[x] Pain killers

[x] Sleeping pills

[] Anti-depressants

[x] Mood stabilizers

[] Anti-psychotics 

[] Benzos

[x] Ecstacy

[x] LSD

[x] Mushrooms

[x] Speed

[x] Cocaine

[x] Other


Habits:

[] I keep my eating habits a secret
[] I look at thinspo

[] I count calories 

[x] I’ve had negative intake days

[] I avoid food

[] I hate food

[x] I love food

[x] I want to be this way
[x] I don’t want to be like this

[x] I wish I could have more control

[x] losing weight is my top priority

[x] I am in treatment

[x] I’m doing this for me

[] I’m doing this for someone


I hate: 

[x] when people stare

[] being asked questions (only food related)

[] having to eat

[x] wearing shorts

[] being single

[x] feeling fat

[x] feeling ugly

[x] looking this way

[] fat people


I need:

[] more support

[x] people to stay out of my business

[] more friends

[x] someone to know how I feel

[x] less food

[x] a gym membership

[x] more water

[] to lose 75 pounds

[x] to lose 50 pounds

[x] to lose 30 pounds

[x] to lose 20 pounds

[x] to lose 15 pounds

[x] to lose 10 pounds

[x] to stop hating myself